I'm 21 yo and I don't know what to do with my life. I graduated when I was 17 with good grades, and then I decided to take a year of to work because I wasn't sure what I wanted to study. But it turned out I couldn't find any job (I'm from a small town) and the only jobs that there are in here ask specifically for men. My parents are divorced (I live with my mother) and don't get along; they're also emotionally abusive. But my father has money and he said he would pay college for me as long as it was something like engineering. Guess what? I suck at math and physics, but he doesn't care. I can't get a full scholarship because even though I'm poor, I'm not poor 'enough' to have it, but I wouldn't be able to afford only half of it.I know I've become a burden but I feel stuck, with no escape and nowhere to go. I really need to leave this place it's just sucking out any energy I still have left, but I see no options. I'm seriously considering suicide because I just want to escape all of this. I'm sorry this is so depressing, and I hope that what I wrote makes sense..I just needed some place to vent all this.