Monday, October 23, 2017

[marriage/ in-laws] I DATED MY BOYFRIEND FOR 10 YEARS AND REJECTED HIS PROPOSAL

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I met my boyfriend 10 years ago in my early 20’s and I’m now 30 y.o.
My boyfriend is 1 year older than me.
When we dated at first (~6 years), I used to fight a lot with him.
When we fought, he would always tell me “I won’t be able to marry you”, so me too, I slowly changed my mind.
I love my boyfriend but we slowly started to ignore each other and our relationship became cold.
I started to care less about him and I stopped getting mad at him too.
Instead, I would suppress my anger by crying alone.
While dating my boyfriend for the first 6 years, I wanted to marry him and give birth and raise a kid in a pretty environment, but since then, I’d rather not be married. (T/N: there’s actually a word in Korean “비혼주의자 (bihon-jueija)” that means “person who does not get married”. It has the same connotation as “vegetarian” but for marriage instead of meat :P)
After the 6 first years, I only said good things to my boyfriend and showed a positive sight of myself. Every time I was annoyed or sad, I would endure it myself. Even when my boyfriend made big mistakes, I would forgive him. I never said anything that he wouldn’t like. After dating for 6 years and fighting, it never happened again and my boyfriend even changed into a warm man.
We went on a trip together and it was a happy time. He then proposed to me.
I rejected him and told him that ever since I started dating him, I became a “bihon-jueija”.
My oppa said that he never expected me to say something like that.
So we just broke up. But it wasn’t awkward at all.
Terminating a 10 years relationship feels so dull..

post response:
[+615][-35]
original post: here

부산처자 |2017.10.23 09:56 신고하기
I congratulate you for breaking up. Do you know why he asked you to get married? It’s because  you forgive all his mistakes, always show him a bright image of yourself and always take in whatever he says. If you guys actually ended up marrying each other, if you only complained a bit about his mistakes, he will have no mercy on you. You made the right choice.  Even though you guys ended up on good terms now, you escaped a big hurricane. I hope that you don’t meet him again.
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ㅇㅇ |2017.10.23 14:25 신고하기
If a girl stops getting mad at you, that’s the end. Looks like the guy wasn’t aware of it ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
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12 |2017.10.23 05:24 신고하기
You did well. You suffered a lot. I hope that you only date a guy who would talk prettily with you and who would cherish and love you a lot!!
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ㄲㄲ |2017.10.23 10:32 신고하기
I think I understand where you come from…. There are a lot of cases where guys pretend to love their partners and girls end up misunderstand… if your boyfriend really loved you, he wouldn’t have made you uncomfortable all these past years.
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그래라 |2017.10.23 13:21 신고하기
The girl gave up and the relationship even became cold but that guyㅋㅋ geez, he probably thought that the relationship was evolving
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